Over the past few days a mysterious person has been making comments on my blog trying to bring me down. She claims that she has also lost a child (which I don't believe). Let me just tell you it isn't working. She says I should stop saying life isn't fair and just have another baby to replace Madison. Well if this"person" had truly lost a child they would know that just having another baby will NEVER replace Madison. Yes, I would love to be a mommy to a precious baby on Earth but the time is just not right yet.
So, instead of being mad it just makes me happy. Do you know why? Because I am living my life. I am not hating others for the situation I am in. Yes, it does suck and I have every right to say that. But I am trying to keep on going. I put a smile on my face and I go out into this world with dignity and pride because I am Maddie's mom. I had 4 amazing months with the most beautiful angel, and I am proud to call her my daughter.
73 comments:
You are the strongest and most inspirational person I know....(well I don't know you but I feel like I do). God has wonderful things planned for you.
You are the strongest and most inspirational person I know....(well I don't know you but I feel like I do). God has wonderful things planned for you.
You go, girl!!!
Glad you aren't letting this mysterious blogger get to you. Prayers for renewed strength and spirit :)
Some people just don't have anything good to say. Whatever happened to: "If you have nothing nice to say, don't say anything at all." It's sad that someone made the choice to come to your blog and read it and then try and knock you down. You are an amazing woman and have the utmost strength! There is no one else on Earth that could ever replace Maddie. I have read your blog from the beginning and cried numerous times because I can only feel a small iota of what you feel on a daily basis by trying to put myself in your shoes. Keep your head up (which you do!!) and don't listen to jerks who just want to get a rise out of people. Sad.
What a disgusting person. Some people have no heart and should keep their mouths closed.
Hope the rest of your weekend goes well xoxo
im not sure why people are so mean, or just plain stupid...but props to you for just ignoring them :)
Wow I can't believe some people! You have every right to be upset for as long as you want. I seriously doubt that girl is even a mother, no baby can ever be replaced.
People are really stupid. Please don't let them get to you. I know that's easy for me to say, but you only give them their 'kicks' when you acknowledge them-in any way. Whenever you get a negative comment like that, just delete it and don't even let them know you got it. That's what they are looking for. They are sick like that. Sick, ignorant and pure stupid.
I am so sorry that you have to deal with any of this. Nothing about losing a child makes sense. You appear to be handling just like I think I would or anyone else who has lost or may lose a child(God forbid). You have good days, bad days, happy days and sad days. You know you are a good person and you have nothing to be ashamed of or feel guilty about. Period. Don't give them an ounce of your time. The don't deserve it!
Dont let anyone bring you down. Im with you, if this woman truly lost a child...she would know that child could NEVER be replaced.
You have every right to be mourning, sad, upset, angry at what happened. You not only had 4 months on earth with your angel, you carried her for 9 months..and you love her and she loves you. Someday when you are blessed with another child, you will love that child as well...but no doubt that baby will not replace Madison.
I do not know you, but I read your blog. You are truly an inspiration just to see that you are living life and still trusting in God. I dont know what I would do if I lost my 12 month old, she is the love of my life just as Madison was for you.
Again, dont let some random person bring you down. God loves you, Madison loves you, and you are an inspiration.
Good for you!!! I think you are an amazing Mommy to your sweet little angel and don't let anyone bring you down. I have been reading your blog for the past couple of months and you are such an amazing person with one of the most beautiful angels watching over you.
Wow. Ummm....that makes me really angry :( Can you delete or block this person?? You grieve how you want...when you want...for as long as you want...
I can't believe someone would be such a jerk :( Hugs...
I just want to tell you I think you are the strongest mommy and appreciate how real you are on your blog. I am sorry for the bad comments people are leaving.
I think about your story often and was thinking it would be neat to start 'Maddie's Gift' or something like that.
You could ask people to buy one of your bows to donate to local hospitals to send home with their newborns along with a SIDS pamphlet or things you wished you knew (like Angel Care Monitor)...... something like that.
I think it would be a great way to honor her memory and put your bow making skills to great use!
Keep you chin up!
I'm truly sorry somebody could be so cruel. Good job on not letting them get to you. No one can tell you when the time is right for another child. That is something only u and God know. You are an amazing person and I feel blessed to follow your inspirational journey. You have been delt a very hard hand and you have handled it with such grace. More importantly you have realized that no matter what you will always be maddie's mommy and right now just take time to let God help your hurt. I'm not going to lie to you and say ull wake up and feel so much better tomorrow or say I know how you feel because I don't but I do know one day you will get to a point where you realize you went two or three days and didn't cry. I pray for you and your husbands comfort. Feel free to contact me anytime .
This person should be ashamed. First, I can't believe someone would even say something like that. Clearly they have never lost ANYONE, let alone their own child. Nothing can every replace a lost loved one, and, as I don't have kids, I can't even imagine what it must be like to lost your child.
I continue to be in awe of your strength. You ARE living your life, when facing the hardest thing, and even when thoughtless others are trying to make it harder for you. Good for you. You are such a special individual, and a true representation of what it means to be strong and full of faith.
We all know that no one will ever replace Maddie, though I do hope that one day when the time is right, you are blessed with a sibling for Maddie. :) xo
What an a**hole!! Block this person from your comments. Don't let them bring you down. What a mean spirited jerk. There are a lot of idiots out there and its a shame they prey on people who have suffered a loss. Its like it gives them joy to be mean. They will have to be judged by God when their time comes and what comes around goes around. Sorry, I don't mean to be so nasty, but that's just sh*tty. Keep on blogging and don't let it get to you. Sending you hugs and prayers!!!!!
Great attitude, Kellie! We do the best we can, when we can, and when we can't, we can't. Hooray for you for not letting any one else decide what your grieving process should be. It's YOURS. Do with it as you see fit.
Don't listen to that lady! You are amazing and absolutely need time to heal and only you and your hubby know when that time of healing is done and it us time to have kids again- you love and loved Maddie- do not let anyone pull you down! Keep your chin up!
Do not let her pull you down! You need time to heal- only you and your hubby can determine how long that healing time is- you love and loved Maddie so much! keep your chin up!
wow, I can't believe someone has the audacity to say that to you. You have every right to be angry, upset, feel broken or happy, it is all normal when mourning the loss of a close loved one, especially a child. Keep your head up and continue to be proud of your beautiful little girl and the type of loving parent you were and continue to be. Like you said, that person simply isn't like you, they live their life with hate, and you live yours with love and pride, even when you have every right to be angry. I have been following your story for months and have been astounded at your ability to stay strong, even in moments when you feel weak. You are doing a great job honoring your daughter and her memory, don't let anyone tell you otherwise.
Good for you! Stay strong and continue to spread your message. It amazes me how rude and hurtful some people can be.
That completely blows my mind! I just found out I am pregnant with my 2nd baby. My little girl will be 4 about a month before this baby is born. Right now, I can't imagine losing EITHER of my babies! I could never CHOOSE which one to lose. I would never have another baby to replace another one. WOW! I think that when it's time, another baby will definitely bring joy to your life but boy or girl, it will never replace your maddie!
Kellie-
I just really dont understand people. After my daughter Ryan was stillborn, I joined an online support group. It was supposed to be safe. But there was a woman there friending us all on FB and stealing photos of our babies and editing them and trying to pass another womans baby as her own. I have no idea WHY anyone would ever want to pretend they lost a baby. EVER. I CANNOT imagine what you are going through. Losing Ryan was the hardest thing I have ever done and I never held her alive, only still. My pain is unimaginable somedays so I cant even fathom how you feel. There are people out there that really just like to be hurtful and get a joy out of someones sorrow. I dont know you, but your strength is amazing and look how inspirational your blog is to others...dont take what one person says to heart. You will hurt for the rest of your life for your daughter. You can never replace a child. ANYONE that has ever lost a baby would never say that. Big hugs pretty lady!! Saying lots of prayers for you!
I don't know you, but wow. Don't we all just want to punch this person.
And of course she doesn't have the balls to give her name I am sure...and she has yet to try and defend her actions by commenting on this post! Let me at her Kellie, I'll kick her ass! NO ONE has the right to tell anyone how to grieve, especially mourning the loss of a child. It is quite obvious that she either hasn't lost a child, or didn't care for the one she did lose. A good mother could never just "replace" a heavenly child. Keep your chin up! You will know when it is time for you and James to bring another baby, a new, precious, not Maddie baby into the world. And you will do a wonderful job of loving that baby for who he or she is and not because you are replacing your first born.
Was it an anonymous person? I had something similar on my blog...she lost her child, husband, and best friend...? Check out my blog to see if it looks similar (she posted on "jibber jabber" "clarifications" and "response to anonymous") I ended up leaving the comments because I had a few people stick up for me.
Good for you! You will always be Maddie's mommy and no other child could ever replace her, no matter how much they are loved. Some people just need to bring others down to feel better about themself. You are doing as well as anyone could possibly expect. You should be proud of yourself for all the wonderful things you are doing!
That's horrible and insensitive. Sending love !
Kellie,
I love you because you are strong, you are not trying to pretend to be something you're not, you're a great mom with a beautiful smile and personality, you're my inspiration. I could go on and on. This is your personal blog and if this lady doesn't like what you are writing then she should quit reading your post. Its her choice to read them, so if she doesn't like you expressing how you feel and how you are encouraging others then she should quit following your blog. Anyway I hope you have a wonderful weekend. Praying for you and sending (((HUGS))) your way :)
<3 love ya Chick <3, Stay Strong!!!
I am new to this whole blogging thing and somehow stumbled onto your blog. Might be all the ads or keywords? Anyhow, I am started reading through (beautiful blog, BTW) and noticed that our babies are the same age? I actually think they were born on the same exact day! (10/14/10???) I just want you to know that you have really inspired me to pull through. While I did not lose my baby I did have a rough start. I am now more appreciative of the way things happened for me rather then hate the way things happened. You have given me the strength to just accept them and to go forward. I almost feel really stupid & silly to grieve for what I didn't get! How foolish am I??? Don't let anyone tell you that you need to get over loosing your child. Keep her memories alive forever. You are her mom, her voice. She will live through you. And you are exactly right, no other child will ever replace your Maddie. She will always be there in spirit and a wonderful big sister for any future children you may have. Hope you have a wonderful weekend :.)
Some people are just plain assholes and heartless. I dont know why they bother to read blogs when they have nothing nice to say either. Keep on being you, and that's not only Maddie's Mom but a STRONG WOMAN!
Sounds like that someone is a bit envious of all of the attention you are receiving. Some people will do anything to be noticed - whether it's good or bad attention they receive in the long run.
Disregard immaturity such as hers. You are surrounded in far more people who support you and hurt with you over Maddie's death than people like her.
**hugs**
That is horrible for someone to say to have another chikd...they obviously don't know your pain. Your strength is an inspiration and your a amazing person dont let others bring you down you are way better than that and i don't even know you except that you are a wonderful mom for letting Maddie live through precious memories ... Stay strong and keep your faith for one day she greet you at those gates...
Awe... you are an inspiration to so many others. And this blog is your way of expressing your thoughts, feelings, and I'm sure helps you so much in the grieving process. NO one should be as cruel to say that having another will replace Madison. At the point of conception there is no love greater than a Mommy's love for their child(ren)... so be yourself and let others be inspired by your courage, strength and willingness to move on. God has BIG plan for you and James (and Madison too:))!
You should be proud! You do have a beautiful daughter, and she is also proud of you! This world is not only unfair, but has some cruel people in it as well. I'm glad to hear the comments of some are rolling off your back. No one has the right to tell you how to feel, or what you should do to ease the pain you're in. Hold your head up, Maddie's watching! :) God bless!
It must be hard to try and ignore those ignorant comments. Just know you have many MORE people here to support you. You are SO strong even on those bad days for just getting out of bed and carrying on. You are keeping the memory of your daughter alive and she would be proud of you!
Your right.. you can feel anyway that you want and its ok... and I also believe that if this woman "truly" had experienced loss.. she would not be giving you a hard time but supporting you.. Its redic the way some ppl act... I think you are a wonderful mother!
People never cease to amaze me. I'm sorry someone is saying those things to you. From what I can see from your blog, you're doing the best you can to deal with this unthinkable loss. If it had happened to me, I probably wouldn't even be able to get out of bed for months.
I hope you and your hubby can have a happy weekend.
I just wanted to tell you that I have been following your blog ever since you received that horrible news.
I know you don't know me, but I look at your updates on a regular basis. You are a truly strong and amazing person! God bless you for being able to help other mother's and try your hardest to move forward while being honest not only with your self but with everyone who keeps up with your blog!
I do not have a child and will not pretend I could even understand what the battle you fight is like, but I hope you realize you are an inspirational person. I hope every day is better and better and blessed for you!
Thank you for sharing your story and struggle with so many!
What a horrible person!! I am so glad you're not letting her get to you. You are so strong and inspirational!! I agree so much with what others have said....God has amazing things planned for you and your husband.
Don't let those comments get to you. I don't know what kind of sick person does stuff like that. I have also lost a child and had even well meaning family members tell me I should just have another baby. I have had other babies and yes they are joys and blessings and no, they did not replace our precious daughter who we lost.
What is wrong with people? How could they even say that? Ugh...some people.
The world wide web is a scary place of anonymity and zero boundries. My guess this is a teenager with little sense and even less heart. It is good to ignore such ignorance. But I am guessing in this first moments after reading such drivel you were hurt and for that I am very sorry. I am a pediatric oncology nurse and I see this happen all too frequently. Parents create sites to keep family and friends update on the health of their I'll child and someone begins hate posting. It is all fun for them. I imagine a room full of teenage girls taking turns being cruel. It is so sick. Sicker still that their parents have no idea they engage in such disturbing behavior. Know this, for every cruel word. There were a hundred more kind ones said in prayer for you, James and your beautiful girl! I am so sorry.
you are such an amazing, wonderful and courageous woman...how anyone could want to bring you down is beyond me. You are amazing and you inspire so many people (myself included) thanks for always posting what's in your heart and always with such honesty. Love your blog!!
:] I am lovin' your attitude! You are so strong mama!
you are doing awesome! The pic is beautiful <3
Can you fix it so people who dont have a name with valid email cant post? It makes me sad that someone would want to post to hurt a momma who is grieving....
There definitely are lots of strange and heartless people who think it's nothing to post hurtful comments on blogs. So glad you are seeing through that. You are just about the strongest woman I have ever read about, and your outlook inspires me!
I agree, a parent who lost a child would never say "have another to replace the one you lost". Other babyloss mothers are there for support and to lean on each other when they need it. Keep your head up, your daughter is beautiful and even though you only had her for 4 short months, she was yours and always will be.
No one can ever take that away from you.
Oh, how sad that this person feels that you could ever replace a child :-( I HAVE lost a child, and while I went on to have two more healthy wonderful children, the son that I loved and lost was never and will never be "replaced" and of course you know that Maddie will never be replaced. Nor can you ever love a child the way that you loved her...and that's ok. How wise and responsible you and your husband are knowing that another, new child is not the answer to pain and grief. Life ISN'T fair. what happened to y'all ISN'T fair and you know this. why not scream it from the rooftops right now? It's how you feel. And saying what you feel is probably the single most important part of the "healing" process. I commend you for your strength and for putting yourselves out there for the world to see as you grieve for your daughter and undergo your healing process. Your healthy way of dealing with your daughters passing and your journey through your grief is an inspiration to all of us who read your words and a true testament of your faith in Christ and his never ending mercy.
Sorry that someone is not being nice. Be strong and keep on smiling!
Ugh, people just suck sometimes. :( It takes a very special person to have gone through what you went through and be able to write the most beautiful, heartwarming entries that you do. I read your blog just about every day and it truly is an inspiration. Sending thoughts your way from South Carolina! :)
I have no idea why someone feels that that is a good way to behave but I love that you are who you are and are able to brush them off with a beautiful smile. Maddie would be proud of her strong mummy xxx
Hi. I noticed my message to you from yesterdat didn't post. I hope I didn't offend you. I truly don't know what the writer said to you, but I was trying to share with you that in time the hurt will decrease and that for me having another baby did help with my healing process. My new baby didn't replace the one we'd lost nor did she take away all the hurt, but having her arrive safe and healthy and then enjoying all the joys she brought to our family sure did ease some of my sorrow. Still, over a decade later I think of my lost little one every September 9th.
May God continue to help you heal and to feel His peace. By the way, I bet Maddie enjoys listening to you when you talk to her. She still knows you are her momma and she can feel your love all the way up in Heaven.
Wow, what a horrible person! You're right and life isn't fair and what you're going through does suck. And you have EVERY right to say so. I'm glad you know this person is just trying to bring you down and you're strong enough to ignore them. The rest of us who read your blog are nothing but amazed by you and your strength.
Hey Bosie. I am not sure what h happened to your comment. For some reason sometimes comments do not come through to me. I am so sorry!
Kellie, no apologies necessary. Technical glitches are not your problem. =)
P.S. I wish Blogger had spell check for comments. I just noticed a typo in my earlier post. Doh!
How horrible!!! ((hugs)) You just keep right on doing what you are doing, and ignore them. They don't know what they are talking about!
Kellie,
You're an amazing moma and don't let her get you down. Whether she lost a child or not doesn't matter everyone handle's the grief differently and there is nothing wrong with that. Today I the 1 year anniversary since we took out Baby Gabriel to the hospital where we said our goodbyes to him two days from now. We do have 4 other children so we will not be having anymore but i do know that if we ever did that baby would never ever replace my Gabie. You stick to your guns and be strong and do what is right for you.
Love Amy
God will know when the time is right for you to have another baby. Dont let anyone bring you down or tell you when the right time is!
Thank you for sharing your beautiful story with us!
Thats horrible..im sorry someone is trying to bring you down. You EVERY right to scream it from the rooftops thats its not fair. But, honestly this is YOUR blog and you can say WHATEVER you want. If she does not like it she does not need to visit..seems pretty simple to me
You and James give many people inspiration and strength. There will always be people who hate for no reason or selfish reasons but then there are even more people out there who appreciate and love. Thank you so much for sharing such a personal painful chapter in your lives. Maddie would be so proud of you!
Wow, I cannot believe somebody would stoop so low! How horrible! Big hugs...
I was so sorry to hear about the negativity someone is trying to pass on to you. I applaud you for not giving in, and for being so strong, and for sharing your story.
Why are those rude people always anonymous? Cowards! You have every right to feel however you want! It's your life, not hers! You are amazing and strong!
I have been following your blog for some time now and think about you and maddie often. Saturday my baby girl will be 4mths old and I can't help but think about your angel. I'm sorry you have to deal with mean people. God Bless your entire family.
Way to go! Isn't it such a great feeling to turn around to the negativity and embrace it with love. Such a great feeling :).
I think Maddie's Mom is amazing! You will always be Maddie's Mom. I don't know you except through your blog but I'm proud of you and I know Maddie is too!
How sad that someone would make such insensitive comments. Sorry you had to deal with that.
I enjoy reading your blog. Even though it breaks my heart, it has changed the way I look at my little girl. When I feel myself getting frustrated or emotionally spent, I think to myself, "Kellie would give anything to be up half the night with her screaming child" or "Kellie would give anything to see her little girl have a tantrum." It really puts things into perspective. Thanks for being so brave and sharing your story of Maddie. =)
You go girl! You're doing great! Don't let anything get you down!
That person is probably a coward and only post and anonymous! People like that have nothing else better to do with their lives then to try and bring people down!!!
Good for you for not letting them bring you down!! You have every right to be mad, upset, angry. ((hugs))
Good for you! You are an amazingly strong woman. I can't believe there are people that hurtful and negative that would say such mean and ugly words to someone they do not know. Please don't let people like that get you down! You are going with God's plan. He will never let you down :)
Oh sweetie, I'm so sorry someone is trying to bring you down like that! It's just terrible. I think you're right! Clearly that person has never lost a child or else they wouldn't say such hateful things to someone who is hurting as bad as you are. I love all my children and if I ever lost one there would be no replacing them! You can replace objects but definitely not children. Maddie was so beautiful so there's no forgetting her anyway. I'm sure she's watching over you and is very proud of her mommy!
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