4 years old. How did this happen?
This birthday has hit me pretty hard. I teach preschool and the kids in my class are 4. So, I feel like I have a pretty good grasp on how she would be acting.
I am sure she would of loved Frozen. She should be prancing around our house singing "let it goooooooooo" in the most amazing voice.
I should be singing with her being sooooo loud in her Elsa costume.
I should be painting her toenails pink because that's the only color she likes.
I should be reading books to her about princesses.
We should be working really hard on letters and sounds to get her ready to start school soon.
I really try hard not to think about all the things
I don't know if being pregnant has made me so emotional this birthday, or if its just a rough patch in my grief process. I bet it's a a little of both. I think going through all her stuff has really made my grief process start in a different direction.
It's hard to think this way, but if she was still here would we have Jackson? or even Brooklynn? I cant imagine my life without them. I know she was called to heaven for a reason and one day we will find out why. As for now we need to keep our heads up. Maddie knows we love with with all our hearts and we are so grateful she is watching over her little brother and sister. Some people only dream of angels, I held one in my arms.
Happy Birthday my sweet little girl.
I know you are partying big up in Heaven. I love you to the moon and back.
