Guess what??

My 24 hour urine collection came back PERFECT! That is one thing off my back!

Guess what else??

My dr. said I can start easing off bed rest. She told me to take it easy because I am going to be tired. I'm not allowed to go back to work. We are still monitoring my blood pressure and going back to work is stressful. So, I guess I am kinda still on "house arrest" but I'll take it!!!

Today I started really nesting. I cleaned for about 30 minutes and I was exhausted. So I am taking lots of breaks and just taking things slow. James and I are so excited about Jackson's arrival, but now I am kinda starting to freak. Do we really have everything? Is everything safe? How am I going to handle him being here and Maddie not being here? It is going to be a very emotional time. I am sure of that.

35 weeks

I made it to 35 weeks!!

Today I had a SUPER long doctors appointment. They did a NST, ultra sound and I saw my dr.

Good News: I am still a fingertip dilated. Doctor said my ultra sound looked good. Jackson is head down and face down. My fluid levels looked good too. They did not take all the measurement for his weight. So I didnt get that BOO!!!

Bad News: I have protein in my urine. I get to do the FUN 24 hour urine collection starting tomorrow morning. Protein in my urine can be the beginning of pre-elclampsia or it could be nothing. We will not know until Thursday afternoon.

I have felt good today. I was up a lot and only had 1 contraction. It felt good to walk around and be out of the house.

I just thought of this today... I am 35 weeks... I had Maddie at 36 weeks. WOW. He could potentially be here any day. I am excited , but so scared.

I just want to keep him in..

Sorry I haven't updated lately. I have been in a blogging funk. I guess just a funk in its self.

Yesterday I had another scare. I thought we were going to have to go to the hospital. I was contracting every 2 minutes. They were horribly painful contractions too. I tried to stay calm and figure out what may of set them off. I had drank tons of water. I didn't really get up to much. I did go to my moms and lay on her couch. I was just so tired of laying in our bed. You can only stay in 1 place for so long. After about an hour of contracting every 2-5 minutes I decided it was time to call the doctor (not my dr- the on call dr). I told him what was going on. He told me to go on bed rest for the rest of the day. This is exactly why I dont like talking to the on all doctors. I fell like they have no clue what is going on with me. After explaining to him that I was on bed rest and I was "resting" when this happened. He suggested taking some Tylenol and going to bed. He told me I could go in if I wanted to, but he didn't want to waste my time. I was beyond frustrated at this point. I already knew that. So, I just laid and continued timing my contractions. Little by little the time in between them got longer and longer. Finally they stopped. I'm still not sure what brought them on but today I have not left the bed.

Today it hit me.... why am I SO anxious to have Jackson? After I give birth to him I am no longer physically protecting him. I feel like he is so vulnerable after that. I know God already has his life planned, but this feeling of helplessness as a mom that I have will not go away. Of course I will do everything to protect him, but I am going to worry about him 24/7. I will be lucky if I can sleep at all in the next 18ish years. I know that is silly to think , but its the truth. I know I HAVE to sleep and let others take care of him. I know this, but is my mind and body going to let me? I hope so. I am praying that James and I will be able to do this.

Next week is our CPR training for infants. I am nervous. I am not nervous about the training I am nervous to know exactly what EMS did to my Maddie girl. That freaks me out. I pray that I will be able to get through this class without a breakdown. I am so lucky it a private class with just our family. I know I will be supported through the whole thing. I am just scared.

Sorry for being in a funk. I need to get out of it. Feeling better today has helped. I did finish "Catching Fire" today. I was pretty good. I am will start the 3rd book tomorrow. Tuesday is my next dr's appt and I am excited. I get to have an ultra sound, NST and see the dr. I cant wait to see Mr. J on the big screen. Any bets on his weight this time? Its been 2 weeks..Last time he weighed 5 pound 2 ounces.

Bed rest day 10 and 11

Bed rest day 10 (Friday)

I woke up feeling just off. I couldn't put my finger on why I wasn't feeling good. My stomach hurt and I just felt yuk!

I laid around pretty much all morning and just watched TV. I made myself eat lunch and finally started to feel better. I did have a few episodes of strong cramps but they went away.

James and I went and took some more maternity pictures last night. The pictures with both of us didn't come out to Beth's liking. I was excited to actually get dress and get out of the house.

Here I am 31 weeks 6 days

The whole time we were taking pictures there was a bunny following us around. It was so cute! I just know it was Maddie stopping by for a visit!

Bed Rest Day 11 (Saturday)
Today I am 32 weeks pregnant (8 months)! We made is another week!!! I am so thrilled Jackson is still baking. My goal is still 35 weeks. Yes, I know it is not full term but as of now that is the goal my dr and I have set. Once I make it to 35 we will make a new goal! So 3 more weeks Jackson..keep baking baby boy!!

Today James and I are just hanging around the house watching tv, and movies. I have felt pretty good today. I really want to nest but its hard from a sitting position.

Last night Jackson was doing something strange in my belly. He woke me up several times in pain. It wasn't the regular kicks, elbows and turns. I hope he did not turn breech!! I go to my high risk dr on Thursday so I guess we will see then.

Have a great weekend everyone!!!

Bed rest day 8 and 9

Sorry I didn't update yesterday.

Nothing really to report. I have just been relaxing..making bows and Jackson's hospital wreath..
I have been asked what the wreath is for... Maybe its just a southern thing but it goes on the hospital door after he is born.

Thank you Pinterest..

After months of debating on getting Maddie's birth certificate or not ( remember I was told it was going to be stamped with "DECEASED" on top) something came up and I HAD to order it. Today I went to pick it up ( no I didn't stand in line so I am following my "sit" rest rules). I sat down with the lady that was going to print it for me and I filled out all the paper work. She went back to get it and I prayed that she would not stamp it. I couldn't bare to see those words and I didn't dare tell her she was gone. I was on the verge of tears. It was the longest 5 minutes of my life. She handed me her birth certificate and the stamp was NOT there!!!!! I said thank you and literally ran ( ok walked fast) out of there. I got to my car and started bawling. There were so many mixed emotions. I am so thankful she didn't stamp it and I was so happy I finally got her birth certificate...but so sad that she is gone.

I havent really had any cramps until this afternoon. I really think that I just needed to drink more water, but I am kinda feeling yukie today. Maybe its just the weather here...its pretty gross!

I am ready for the weekend. I can't wait to spend some time with James!

Day 7 bed rest

Well today started off with a BAM!!

TMI- I woke up to brown spotting. Not a lot so I didn't freak. I called the dr and she wanted me to come in. So I sat around and wondered of every possible thing that could be wrong until 1:00 when I got ready to go to the dr's office.

When I got there they hooked me up to the monitors so I got even more time to let my mind wonder. I was having cramps during the monitoring so I just knew it was going to be bad news.


My doctor came in and said I had no contractions and Jackson's heart rate looks great. She checked me and said I was not dilated. At that moment I felt so dumb. No contractions? Am I just crazy? I reminded her about my water breaking with Maddie after all of this happened last time. I asked her if she thought it could happen again. She told me it could or it couldn't she just didn't know. Not something I really wanted to hear. I wanted a yes or a no. She kept telling me she knows I am scared and just try to relax. I asked about what type of bed rest I'm on and she said I just have to sit. I don't have to be strapped to the bed but as long as I am sitting I am fine! She said I can even go over to friends houses but I have to sit. That was a relief! She did another FFN and a culture. I should have the FFN results by tomorrow morning.

So, after a very scary day Jackson is still baking away. I am excited to see that April is this Sunday. That means I am closer to May!! That also means I will be 32 weeks this Sunday. Only 3 more to "safety". I feel much better after going to see my doctor today. I think I will feel MUCH MUCH better after seeing him on ultra sound next week! Keep praying God and Maddie are listening!

Day 6 bed rest

Having lots of cramps today. At one point they were so strong I didn't think I could drive my self to the hospital even if I tried...then they calmed down. I feel like I need to be seen again. Even if they tell me there is nothing that they can do. Maybe I'm just being paranoid.

I moved up my doctors appointment to Wednesday. It's just one day, but I guess its better then nothing. I am so scared all these cramps are making me dilate and I'm still scared that my water is going to break at any minute.

We got a sneak peak of our maternity pictures today and I LOVE them!

Bethany at Beth V Photography took them. She did an AMAZING job! If you live in Houston I definitely recommend her!

(Those are James cowboy boots from when he was a child)

I can't wait to see the rest!!!

Day 4 and 5 of bed rest

Day 4:
Good news first:

I made it another week! Yesterday marked me being 31 weeks pregnant! If I can keep baking Jackson for another 4 weeks I will be thrilled!! Right now he weighs around 4 pounds. I really REALLY cant wait to hold him, but I also don't think I can make it through a NICU stay. So, keep baking Jack...keep baking!

We had our maternity pictures taken yesterday. We literally tried to take them in our bed but the lighting was just to bad. We did take them in our living room, Jackson's room, our back yard, and in the entry way. I sat as much as I could but after the shoot I was done! My body told me to stop. I started having really bad cramps.

Thank god for my loving mom and wonderfully hubby who cleaned the whole house and finished Jackson's nursery before the shoot. I sat on the couch, floor, bed (really anywhere) and told them what to do. I am so lucky to have such a great support system. (I will get James to take some pictures of Jackson's room..or maybe we can go a video blog from the ground lol).

Day 5:
Today I have been laying around watching tv and sleeping. I started having cramps around 12. I drank some water and took a nap thinking they would go away. I woke up and guess what?? Still there. So I have really been taking it easy today. I made James a grocery list and he headed to the store. He is so lucky my grocery list is already done by isles (yes..oh yes...Don't laugh). Once again I am so lucky to have such a great husband. I have been craving popsicles so I made sure to put that really big on my list!

My weekly doctors appointment is scheduled on Thursday afternoon. I am going to call and see if they can get me in sooner. I need to talk to her about these cramps. Yesterday they were so bad I thought I was going into labor for sure. I am also going to ask about steroid shots to mature Jackson's lungs and ask to have another ffn. I also want to ask her what are the chances my water breaks again SOON, like it did with Maddie. I keep freaking my self out thinking its going to break at any minute.

Jackson and I are just hanging out in bed. Please keep thinking about us. I will update my twitter is anything crazy happens. Hopefully not tho.

Day 3 bed rest

Today is day 3 of bed rest.

I haven't had very many cramps today. Which is awesome!

I am starting to get bored. I really have been on bed rest since Monday afternoon.

I wanted to start making bows today, but I just noticed that I ran out of all my favorite ribbon and bow toppers. So, hopefully my mom can help restock my supplies.

Tomorrow is our maternity pictures. James and I didn't think it was such a great idea for me to walk around at the shoot. James thought we should try and take them out our house. I think it's a great idea. Hopefully we can take some great pictures in Jackson's nursery and in the play room. I am excited to do them here so we can have pictures of Maddie in our shoot. I can't wait to see how they will turn out!

Bed rest day 2

Today I am scared.

Really SCARED!

I got up to take a shower and started having cramps again. I am really trying to stay sitting down but I have to shower and eat you know?

Also, I did something I probably shouldn't of done.

I knew I had these same cramps with Maddie but couldn't remember how far along I was. So I did it... I went back in my blog and read this post.

I felt like I was reading this same post I just posted a few days ago. Everything was the same. I almost went back to L and D yesterday and everything.

Then it hit me.. My water broke 17 days after I started having these cramps. I was 35 weeks then so Maddie wasn't that early. She weighed 6 pounds when she was born.

But, I am only 30 weeks. Now I am so scared that I'm going to have him soon....like very soon. He isn't baked yet. He needs to stay in. I'm a mess!

There are a million things I still need to do ,but I can't I'm stuck in bed. Looks like James is going to have a big long list of things that must be done this weekend.

Please pray it won't happen again and Jackson will stay put.

Day 1 of bed rest

Well it's Day 1 of bed rest and I'm not bored yet!

My sweet BFF, Catherine came by this morning with her lovely boys baring doughnuts and hugs.
We hung out (with me laying down), played in Jackson's room and just talked.
It was so nice to talk and hang out with her and the boys. I am so lucky to have such great friends!

I started having cramps again this morning. After lunch I started writing down the times I was having them. 7 cramps in an hour. I was so scared. My OB told me I would have them, but 7. That seems a little excessive to me! So, me being the scared mommy that I am called my doctor. She called me back saying I will have them and only to be worried if they are constant and timeable (like every 10ish minutes). Well I have still having them. This just really scares me. I didn't have these last time. I'm laying in bed, drinking water and praying for Jackson to stay put!

I am so glad I decided to go on bed rest. Believe me if I did go to school today I would of already gone home.

I haven't started making bows yet. Today I had a ton of phone calls to make about my disability. Tomorrow I will start and post them all for you to see. I am excited about them. I just really LOVE making bows!

Keep praying.... every day we can keep Jackson baking is a miracle!