I think I have been so strong so so so so strong. But today I broke. I couldn't' stop crying. I just kept thinking my baby is gone..she is really gone!
Yesterday I went into Maddie's room and just walked around. There are so many great memories in her room. But, I am so scared I am going to forget all these memories. I have a HORRIBLE memory...and I just don't want to forget!! I keep going over memories in my head, but then I get sad. So, I decided to look through some of her pictures and write down some memories.
Maddie was only 1 weeks old. She was SO mad that I put that flower on her head she would not stop screaming! I was so upset that I could not get a good picture, but now I love this picture..because that's Maddie (full of life).
Or like this picture. James thought I was so silly to take a picture of Maddie's umbilical cord when it fell off. I was such a proud mommy. I remember thinking "OMG what do I do now... Is she going to bleed??". I am so glad I have this picture. I want to member everything about Maddie's life!!
This picture is taken on the floor in Maddie's nursery. I remember this day Maddie was being so sweet. I wanted to learn more about my camera. So, Maddie and I headed into her room to try to figure out some poses to do. I laid her down and she posed herself. (She was 3 weeks old)
My brother took this picture. Maddie was 10 days old. this was taken on the bed in our guestroom. I remember thinking , "Wow its hard to take picture of newborns". Maddie was so good that day. She just wanted to sleep, and we kept waking her up!!!
This is Maddie in one of her many Halloween outfits. I remember thinking she just looks so peaceful. James and I took Maddie outside for a few minutes that night and watched the trick-or-treaters.
This picture is funny! My mom and I took Maddie to a pumpkin patch and it must of been 90 degrees. Maddie was only a few weeks ago, so all she wanted to do was sleep. In almost every picture Maddie is passed out..She would NOT wake up!!!
This is the first time I let Bella really get close to Maddie. We were all "playing".Yesterday I was looking through my maternity pictures...then it hit me. I never got any of my maternity pictures printed because Maddie surprised us with her grand entrance just 2 short weeks later. So, yesterday I sat down and braced my self. I knew it was going to be hard to look at them and it was! But there are some really great photos.
I love you Maddie.. I will do everything in my power to remember everything about you!!
