But, guess what I did the other day???
You guessed it!!
I went to Target feeling energized and happy. I happened to walk past the baby section..So I braced my self for a quick walk through. It was something I needed to do. It was something I needed to check off my "firsts with out Maddie" list.
So, I did it. I walked through the baby section of Target without crying.
Let me just tell you I am SO proud of my self...I DID IT!!
It may seem kinda silly but it felt good. I am doing this. It's hard but I am doing it.
35 comments:
Hi:) good job on making that big step down the baby isle I'm sure maddie was rightbthere with you looking at all of the pretty things! I was wondering if u have seen the show Long Island Medium on TLC? I just watched the episode called "Driving me nuts" and the medium on the show Theresa has a group reading session. In the middle of the session she asks if someone there had lost an infant child. One lady immediately started balling...she had lost her 19 day old baby because she was three months premature. Thersa said she is always around her momma and told her that she was growing and has long beautiful hair. She knew her nicknames and that she had her footprints on ner bracelett! The whole conversation was so touching..I thought of you and your pecious girl right away! The show is very touching..u and your hubs should check it out! Praying for u and your fam always!!
:) way to go kellie!
Way to go on taking such a big step. I admire your strength and the grace you've shown while keeping Maddies memory alive!
Not silly at all!! So proud of you.....and so glad you are allowing yourself to heal, at your own pace...in my thoughts and prayers. Your blog is beautiful and it has touched me deeply. Much love ~ alice
That's awesome! It shows healing...healing is important, and healing doesn't mean you forget, it just means your heart is mending from the brokenness. Hope you have many more healing moments! I love following your blog and celebrating your victories with you! Maddie is precious!
I'm proud of u sweet momma! You were in a happy mood because you had just hung out with me! Love you girl!
Awe! Hooray! I don't know you personally, but I do read your blog regularly.. and my heart just skipped a beat I read of your success. So happy for you!
I wish you many more smiling days.
xox,
Katie
Well done! You are getting stronger! Thanks for sharing!
Good for you! :) Small steps...
Thanks for sharing your moment -I don't think it is silly at all. So happy for your happy moment!
Aw, good for you! Hugs...
Yay! You are so strong Kellie! We've never met, but I feel like I know you from reading your blog. Your story has touched my heart, and inspires me. My daughter was born just a month after your sweet Maddie. Every time I read your blog it makes me hold her a little tighter. I pray that God continues to carry you through this incredibly difficult time. I'm also sorry about all the recent negative comments. There are so many cruel people in this world. I know it's easier said than done, but just ignore them. Don't even waste your time reading them. You have been through enough! I just can't believe people. Big hugs!!
Serene
We all knew you could Kellie! We are so proud of you! It's not silly at all. Way to go!
Good job! I know that must have been SO hard and emotional for you but you DID it! Now when you're having a rough time you have something to look back on and tell yourself "Hey, I did THAT I can handle THIS!"
Way to go Kellie! Maddie is so proud of her mama! That was not easy and you DID it! Way to go lady...can you see your Maddie smiling?
That's a big step!! It's very exciting and very blog worthy:)
yay! What a big step! I know Maddie was with you as you went through the aisles of the baby section!
Awesome job Kellie! I tell you what, I'm listening to Pandora right now and there is a song on that simply reminded me of you and your journey thus far. There You'll Be by Faith Hill, it is an amazing song which brought me to tears when it came on as I read your blog just now. Prayers and well wishes to you and yours.
I had the same problem. I was bitter. I avoided baby sections, baby showers, etc. But with time and prayers, I am able to do these "normal" things now and be okay. This is a big step, good for you!
Hi Kellie - that is a HUGE step, I am sure it wasn't easy. You deserve to brag about it on the blog. Praying for you all :)
~dt~
I'm so glad to hear this!!! =)
That was a hard first step for me. I'm sure Maddie was proud of you. I am. =)
Love, Natalie
You are "another day stronger" indeed! So proud of you...and I know Maddie is, too. I think of you often!!
Susan
Not silly at all! You go girl :)
Happy Tuesday! Hope its great!
That's great! Something who has only been there can completely understand, it took me awhile to walk through, I avoided it like the plague.
Good for you Kellie! I think of you often and this post made me smile. So glad you are making such strides! =]
Wahoo! That is an awesome step and I am sure Maddie was right there with you. Be proud of yourself!
Praying for y'all!
Kelly, I wasn't sure where to leave this comment but I wanted to let you know that I am totally on your side about vaccinations! As a mother who has lost her daughter you just need to find answers right now, whether it's from bumpers, vaccinations, or whatever. You just need to know and I see that. I also wanted to let you know that a good friend of mine had a baby about 5 years ago that was healthy as could be, but after recieving his vaccinations suddenly became very quite and withdrawn. He was diagnosed with Autism shortly after. I am a true believer that many of the shots they have come out with do more hurt than help. But anyways, I hope that somehow you can find the answers you are looking for and people can respect you in a positive light for doing so. Prayers to you and yours! Stacy Lynn-
Good job. Thanks for sharing!! I always look forward to your posts.
You are such an amazing lady, and that doesn't sound silly it sounds like an amazing accomplishment! Like your blog says "another day stronger" keep your head up maddie is always watching you!
WAY TO GO KELLIE!!!!! I can't imagine how hard that was for you & what a sense of relief it must have brought to be able to do it!! So proud of you & praying for you always!!
http://www.washingtonpost.com/national/maryland-health-officials-propose-1st-statewide-ban-on-crib-bumper-pads-over-risks-to-infants/2011/09/27/gIQAdeYI2K_story.html
I saw this and thought of you. :)
Oh this make my hear swoon!!!!! I'm so happy for you kellie!!
<3-
aliria
A small, yet poignant victory. Good for you! Another day stronger. =)
That is NOT silly at all - it's a FANTASTIC positive step on your journey. Those are the things that do keep making you "another day stronger" - Congratulations !
I've been following your blog for a while but have never posted. I saw this poem today and thought of you.
You are a choice woman to take on the challenges given you. God Bless
I'll Lend You A Child
by Edgar Guest
"I'll lend you for a little time a child of mine," He said.
For you to love - while he lives
And mourn for when he's dead.
It may be six or seven years
Or twenty-two or three,
But will you, till I call him back,
Take care or him for Me?
He'll bring his smiles to gladden you,
And should this stay be brief
You'll have his lovely memories as solace for your grief.
I cannot promise he will stay,
Since all from earth return,
But there are lessons taught down there
I want this child to learn.
I've looked this world over
In search for teachers true,
And from the throngs that crowd
Life's lanes, I have selected you.
Now will you give him all your love,
Nor count the labor vain,
Nor hate Me when I come to call to
Take him back again?"
I fancied that I heard then say,
"Dear Lord, Thy will be done,
For all the joy Thy child shall bring,
The risk of grief we'll run.
We'll shelter him with tenderness,
We'll love him while we may,
And for the happiness we've known
Forever grateful stay.
But should the angels call for him
Much sooner than we've planned,
We'll brave the bitter grief that come
And try to understand."
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