I did really good...not a tear until Christmas Day. Once the tears started flowing, I couldn't seem to make them stop.
I missed her. I needed her. I wanted her.
How could we go through another Christmas without our Maddie? It just couldn't be, but it was. Our new normal without her.
Seeing all the little girls in our family open girlie gifts, wearing Christmas dresses, wearing big bows, smiling so bright..it all hurts.
I know Christmas time will always sting a little. The joyful time of year makes your really miss your loved ones that have left to soon.
I feel like we have gone so far in our grief journey, James and I. Last Christmas I cried almost every day. We can now talk about Maddie openly without crying. We both know we love her to pieces and she will always be a part of our family. I will not let this set us back. I will not let the tornado take me away. We are going to keep going, living with our love so open for our little girl.
I hope Jackson can grow up knowing how much love we have for his sister.
We miss you Maddie. We love you so much!
8 comments:
I never actually got the opportunity to meet my son, but I did carry him for almost 5 months. It's hard to accept that he's gone, so I can't imagine your pain even after all of this time. The pain will NEVER go away, like you said but we will keep going and live this life. One day we will be reunited with our little loves and I'm sure they're dancing away in heaven right now! Happy New Year to your family!
Ahhh so sad, I cannot imagine. Her little face, oh so cute.
I am still so sorry for your loss. I cannot even fathom not having my child here for Christmas. I pray for you all the time. I hope this new year brings another measure of sweet healing and peace.
Thinking of you and your precious daughter...
I love reading your blog! I am so over joyed for you and your husband that you now have an amazing little boy to help fill your heart with joy!!
She is so beautiful... as well as your baby boy (he can be beautiful too;)
God Bless your little family...
This made me so sad. It's wonderful that you had Jackson to bring you joy this Christmas. My mom lost her first baby boy at only 2 days old, back in 1960. She just passed away in September, and I like to think she finally got to spend her first Christmas with her little boy. :)
My heart aches for you.
I love that you live with your love for her wide open. I'm sure your son will grow up loving her too.
Post a Comment