My Princess went to heaven...

Those were the hardest words I have ever typed in my whole life.

Yesterday, Thursday February 17th my whole life as I knew it changed. The secretory from our school told me James was on the phone and I knew something was wrong because he NEVER calls the school. As soon as I picked up the phone I heard his sad voice. He told me that Maddie had stopped breathing and the babysitter called 911 and she was going to the hospital. I admittedly ran to my moms classroom and said Maddie stopped breathing she is going to the hospital. I started to grab my stuff and told my mom I couldn't drive myself, so she drove me. We raced to the hospital. When we got there I knew it was bad. The security guard at the front told us to wait for an officer to escort us back. After what seemed like forever the officer told us we can come back. They started to walk around the corner and said no never mind this way and started to open a door. When they started to open the door, I knew she was gone. I started screaming "NO".We sat down on the couch and they told us they did everything they could but she was gone. James wasn't there yet it was just my mom and I. He got there a few seconds later. I was in such shock I couldn't even cry. I just wanted to scream. A nurse told we could see her but it may take a few hours. I didnt care I just wanted to see my princess. Then 2 Sheriff officers came into the room and asked everyone to leave. Her death is being investigate by the homicide unit. They said its protocol. They interviewed us separate and together. The officers gave us the horrific new that we couldn't see her because it would contaminate the evidence. I was devastated. We were told to go home...but how do we go home without our baby girl??
Eventually we drove home. Through many many many tears but we made it. I didnt want to go in our house. Maddie's stuff is everywhere. James and I hand in hand walked inour house. I went straight to her room and we both fell to our knees and cried. How could this happen to us, Maddie was not sick and she was SO happy!!! Te officers had been at the babysitters house investigating and then he came to our house. He brought all of her stuff to us. I lost it. I couldn't see her empty car seat. She is supposed to be in it. This isnt fair!!!! James and I are trying to cope, but we really dont know what to do. We are going today to talk to the funeral home. BUT this isnt supposed to be happening. I am not supposed to get Maddie's death certificate before her birth certificate.

Thanks so much for all the prayers. We really appreciate them!